Turner's Arrival

Well now that we've made it a month into Turner's existence and I'm feeling more myself I thought I'd share Turner's arrival story. If you don't want to hear some minor details related to childbirth, stop reading now and skip to the link with pictures. Otherwise, enjoy the ride.

On September 5 Andy and I went to our second doctor's appointment of the week for a blood pressure check. Weeks prior I had started going twice a week because I managed to develop gestational hypertension. We had already decided with the doctor that I would be induced on September 10 but as we drove to the hospital that afternoon Andy and I had a feeling we wouldn't make it past the weekend.

My BP was the highest it had been during my pregnancy and my doctor said "to be honest, I'm over your blood pressure and think we should be done." We then spent time talking about the pros and cons of inducing even earlier than planned and by the end of the appointment I was headed across the street to the hospital and Andy was headed home to grab our bags.

I spent Thursday night in the hospital because I needed medication to prep me for the induction Friday morning. Friday morning the doctor arrived, broke my water, and the waiting began. I spent the morning visiting with family, dealing with minor contractions, and waiting. By early afternoon the contractions were getting more intense and after snapping at my Dad and he reporting to the waiting room that I had "gone to the dark side" I decided to get an epidural.

My doctor and I had discussed extensively my desire to avoid a c-section at all costs and luckily, because I was progressing (although VERY slowly) she wasn't in a rush. So, Friday morning turned to afternoon turned to evening, turned to Saturday. Within that time I stalled out at 4 cm but after many hours there and lots of Pitocin help, I started progressing again.

Though my doctor wasn't on call that weekend she graciously came in on Saturday and managed my care for as long as she could - a nurse later told us that our doctor had said she really wanted to be with us with Turner came because she had been with us through so much. She really is an amazing doctor! Around noon on Saturday I had progressed to 8 cm and things were starting to move more quickly! A nurse came in and set up the delivery table and we were all preparing for Turner's birth.

By about 1:30 p.m. I was at 9 c.m. and was starting to get a little excited. Then, I stalled out again. Our doctor had to pass us onto the on-call doctor and by 4:30 p.m. we were having the unfortunate discussion about a c-section. Though I was progressing with Pitocin (lots of Pitocin...they turned it up as high as it could go a couple of times) as the contractions got more intense Turner's heart rate increased. With the Pitocin was backed off to help Turner calm down, my contractions would immediately stop. After some time playing the game of more Pitocin, Turner in distress, less Pitocin, no contractions, it was clear that my body was having a difficult time progressing and that, if the intense contractions were stressing Turner out, pushing would make the situation worse.  Though the on-call doctor walked me through what would happen with the c-section and I asked the nurses prepping me to reassure me that everything was going to be just fine, as soon as my family started coming back to see me I lost it. I was so scared and so defeated and so exhausted that the idea of a c-section was too overwhelming. By 5 p.m. they were wheeling me to surgery.

Turner was born at 5:45 p.m. Saturday evening, September 7. That happens to be my grandmother's birthday, so it's very special to have our son share a birthday with such a special woman.  It was the most surreal sound to hear him cry for the first time. They cleaned him up and Andy was able to bring him over to me for a few minutes and then he was taken up to the nursery. I wouldn't hold him myself until after 10 p.m. that evening. I had to hang out in recovery for over an hour and then when I got to the mother/baby unit Turner's temperature wasn't high enough to come out of the nursery for a couple of hours.

Though the plan was to leave the hospital in the normal 48 hours after having Turner (I could have opted to stay for a third day but didn't have to) I ended up staying until Tuesday afternoon because Monday morning I developed an infection. After five days in the hospital (remember, we had started this journey Thursday evening the week before) I was so ready to go home that I was trying to convince the nurses that I could will my fever to go away on its own. Unfortunately for me, they didn't find that an acceptable treatment method. Instead, they started my third IV of the hospital stay, only a couple of hours after I had convinced the nurse to remove my IV since I had every intention of going home the next day, and started antibiotics.

Tuesday afternoon was finally escaped the hospital and brought Turner home.

As for a c-section, there's no way to anticipate what the experience or recovery will be like. Within a few hours after the procedure I told Andy we were only having one biological child. It would take three weeks before I told him I'd consider another pregnancy. I guess we'll just have to see what God has in store for us. We certainly aren't in any rush :-) Instead, we're relishing in every moment we have with Turner and thanking God continuously for the amazing gift He has given us.

If you're interested in checking out Turner's newborn photos, follow the link below. The photos have been added to our maternity pictures, so Turner's beautiful face begins on page 8 of the album. Once you follow the link below you'll click on the large photo of the girl in the pool and then you'll type in "crowefamily" (without the quotation marks) and "turner" when prompted. Enjoy!

http://www.guerrillashots.com/access-codes.html

Turner's Photo Debut!

Last weekend Andy and I met our dear friend and photographer, Tara Jones, in Bedford to take some maternity photos. If you're interested, here's the album! If it prompts you for a password, it's "turner". Just copy/paste the link below.

Enjoy!

http://guerrillashots.zenfolio.com/crowefamily/slideshow

Crowe's Nest Updates

Man, time flies and it's hard to keep up. Here are some updates:

LO's - The case is moving in a very positive direction. We got to increase overnight visits at our last family team meeting so the LO's are now with their mom Friday-Monday. They also get afternoon/evening visits with mom or dad on Tuesdays and Thursdays. It's so amazing to see the children grow, learn new things, etc. It's also amazing how much and how quickly kids change! We're so blessed to be along for a bit of the ride.

Turner - We found out last month that we're having a boy and we're naming him Turner. The name came to Andy as he was trying to find names associated with the Atlanta Braves :-) So yes, our son will be named after a baseball stadium. We haven't decided on any middle names yet but have some in mind. Over the last few weeks I've gotten to feel T move regularly and three nights ago Andy felt him kick for the first time! What a magical experience. We go to the doctor next week and can't wait to hear his precious heart beat again.

The pregnancy - God has given me an amazing pregnancy so far. After longing for this experience for so long, I've been amazed at the grace God has shown me. Though I've had friends who have had very difficult pregnancies, so far things have been going very smoothly for me. I did fail an early 1 hour glucose tolerance test but passed (barely) the 3 hour test. I'll take another test in about a month and we'll see how that one goes. Otherwise, things are wonderful. I'm definitely feeling good right now (23.5 weeks along) and have no complaints. This weekend we're going to have some maternity pictures taken. I'll be sure to share once we have them back!

Work - I'm gearing up for another year of New Student Orientation. The university is transitioning to a university college model for Fall 2013, which means I've been reassigned to a new group of students. I'll no longer work with undecided students but instead will work with first year students interested in laboratory science, computer science, and math majors. Though it will be a big switch, I'm glad to be staying with first year students. I won't be teaching in the fall because of maternity leave but hope to pick up another UNIV 101 course to teach in the spring. Andy has been busy at Labor Link and church and we're gearing up for Vacation Bible School. This year, I'll be teaching the 1st-2nd graders and Andy will be my classroom helper. What out, kids!

Life - Life is wonderful and busy. This summer I'm starting a Ph.D program, taking my first class in June/July. I'm planning to apply for the Curriculum and Instruction Ph.D program for the Spring of 2014. First major hurdle is taking the GRE again. I've been avoiding it for a while but plan to begin my studying this summer with the goal to get the test done before Turner arrives.

House - We still love our house. When we bought the house we told ourselves that we wouldn't make any real changes to the house until we'd lived in it a year. Boy, was that easy. I can't believe it's already been more than a year!  With the warmer weather comes the desire to start all kinds of outdoor projects. My current obsession is landscaping the yard, but we haven't done a lick of work yet. And since we didn't do any planning and want to pay for home improvements in cash, the landscaping project may have to wait another year. Or at least a few months. For now, we're just trying to keep up with mowing the yard and pulling weeds. Last week, the kids and I came home from the day and C told me that something was in my "dead garden." He was referring to the flower garden that's by our front porch. It's full of green plants, including a number of weeds. I tried to explain that it was booming with life, but I think it just looked like chaos to him. Project #1 for this weekend - do something about that...

The Most Precious Sound

There is no doubt that last Wednesday, February 27, 2013, Andy and I heard the most precious sound imaginable...the heartbeat of our first baby. We found out in January that we're expecting our first child and thankfully Wednesday we were able to see and hear that baby for the very first time. It was, none other than the most amazing experience I've ever had. But the story doesn't start there.

Disclaimer: If you continue reading, you may find yourself saying - that's too much information. We are talking about having a baby here, people. Continue at your own risk.

In November of 2008, after only five months of marriage, Andy and I decided we wanted to start a family. We knew it might be a long and trying journey, as I have PCOS, which can cause a lot of fertility issues. Shortly after trying on our own, my doctor suggested fertility treatments, which we began, but had no success with. We decided that God was telling us it wasn't the right time, so we took a break. Months later, we tried again, with the assistance of fertility treatments, but again saw no success. Again, we took a break. By this time, it had been nearly two years of trying to start a family and we wanted to take some of the pressure off of ourselves.

"Wait for the Lord; Be strong, and let your heart take courage; Yes, wait for the Lord." Psalm 27:14

When we moved to Terre Haute at the very end of 2010, we decided that the time was now right and were hopeful that God would allow us to experience the gift we had been praying for for nearly three years. After another year of trying without fertility treatments, we decided that it was time to think about other options. That decision led us to the Foster Care System, but that story is old news :-) (if it's not old news, go back and read some earlier blog posts.)  Then, in July of this year, we again decided to pursue fertility treatments. In August, we received our first foster placement and suddenly had three children living with us. Talk about interesting timing! In November I again visited my doctor after months of not conceiving and we discussed the next option in fertility treatments. Andy and I decided that we would try one more month with our current approach and then, after Christmas, we'd consider more options.

Though I was starting to get mildly excited in January, I tried to hold back. After four years of trying to have a baby and because my PCOS can easily cause long or missed cycles, you might be able to imagine the number of pregnancy tests I've been through, always receiving a negative result. But, at the urging of my sister, I tested a few days earlier than I had told myself I would and would you know, I got a positive test! Of course, I couldn't believe my eyes. It was 5:30 in the morning, so my eyes weren't working very well anyway and Andy was working already so the only people with me (the little ones) weren't going to be an option for verifying the test. I looked at the test, said "oh my God, oh my God" walked into the living room smiling, saying "oh my God, oh my God" and then back to the bathroom to see the test again, repeating the same phrase over and over again. Luckily, got gave me the ability to get on with it and I continued through our normal morning routine. Once C was on the bus to school, I took a moment to sneak in to our bedroom to show Andy the test. I was so proud of myself for not spilling our news to him the second he walked in the door. His first reaction was "what does that mean?!" to which I replied "it means we call the doctor to get a confirmation test done." So before heading to work that morning, I called the doctor's office (from their parking lot) to see if I could come in for a test. A couple of hours later, they called with the news that the blood test was positive. After saying another round of "oh my God" to the nurse and disclosing to a total stranger that we had been waiting on this call for four years and reassuring her that I was happy and not scared or upset, I called Andy. This was probably 11 a.m.

Now, the plan, which we had discussed multiple times, was that we would tell immediate family first and then wait to tell other friends and family until we had heard the heartbeat. So I called Andy at 11 a.m. and by 11:03 a.m., everyone he worked with knew. He blamed it on the fact that he cried like a baby when I told him the news, but I still don't know if I buy it :-)

You have put more joy and rejoicing in my heart than when their wheat and new wine have yielded abundantly. Psalm 4:7



Despite being overjoyed, I continually fought fears for five weeks leading up to our first ultrasound appointment. Though I'm not a pessimist, I do struggle with always thinking of the worst scenario before taking time to imagine the best situations. Plus, I've had many dear friends experience miscarriage and was terrified. So I didn't let myself get too excited and waiting, very impatiently, for yesterday to arrive. Once I saw the screen and heard the heartbeat, everything changed. It was so amazing to see, at just 10 weeks, the form of a little baby, moving around like crazy, its hands, and feet, and even little face on the screen. The technician let us hear the heartbeat right away and then towards the end, I asked if we could hear it again! She said of course and it was just as beautiful the second time as the first. Andy asked if we could hear it a third time so he could record it on his phone, but of course he was denied that request (count on Andy to ask questions that most people won't dare to ask.)

The whole thing is still very surreal. When we were in the doctor's office, I told our doctor that I couldn't believe we were there talking about a pregnancy, considering we had just been there a few months prior talking about the next step in fertility treatments! Despite praying for this child for four years, hoping, wishing, pleading for the opportunity to become parents, now that it has finally happened, I can't wrap my head around it. Though it definitely feels more real, I still can't phathom the miracle God has given us.

We're due in late September, just ten weeks after Aubrei and Dan (Yes! For those of you who know the Weddle Sisters, we are in fact pregnant with our first babies at the same time!!!) and are really looking forward to everything this year has to offer. Luckily for me, my sister gets to go throw labor and delivery before me (something I know she would prefer to be the other way around) so I'm thankful for that! Also, as usual, I'm wanting to soak up as much information as possible, so for anyone out there who likes to share, feel free to pass along all the good information you have about everything related to babies.

There's no doubt that God has been shaping and sharpening us for this very moment and though at the time it was excruciating to wait and discouraging to think this opportunity would never come, God has given us the most amazing gift we could ever ask for and had surely given us the desire of our hearts!

"Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart." Psalm 37:4

Until the next post!

"Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you who belong to Christ Jesus." 1 Thessalonians 5:18

A Very Merry Christmas and Happy New Year from the Crowes!

We've noticed that it's difficult to find time to blog while children live in our home :-) But, despite the sabbatical from blogging, life has continued on! Here are a few updates!

Andy's doing well. At the beginning of the year, he'll begin the sales side of Labor Link, visiting local businesses to try and gain new temp accounts. With his personality and experience in sales, I know he's going to do great in this new role!

Ashleigh continues to help students find their way at ISU by advising undecided students. In addition, she continues to teach UNIV 101, a university skills class she very much loves to teach. Last semester she taught two have semesters courses and this semester she'll teach a full term course and perhaps a half semester course, if necessary. Though she loves advising, she also appreciates the opportunity to impact students in the classroom, too. Speaking of the classroom, Ashleigh also plans to retake the GRE this semester in preparation for entering a Ph.D program. She doesn't know when she'll start the program, but she knows the first step is getting an updated GRE score, so that's where she'll start!

Now, the reason you really read - the LO's. They're each doing very well. C continues to loves school and is really excelling there! He's so smart and witty and challenges us everyday as we attempt to answer his curious questions!

S continues to learn new words every day and is even beginning to put words together in short sentences! It's such a joy to witness, considering that when he first came to us, he barely spoke and never tried new words. Now we can't stump him with any words...he's willing to try it all! As he learns more words, he's also showing more of his personality and we're discovering that he's pretty stinkin' hilarious! Today we told him he woke up on the funny side of the bed, because from the moment he woke up, he was crackin' us up. Then, when we picked him up from the nursery the volunteers told us that he was a "hoot" the whole time!

M is starting to take steps, is weening off the bottle, and turns one in January!! It's such an exciting time for her and we're so blessed to get to experience this with her. We know she's days away from walking and we can't WAIT! The poor girl still doesn't have any teeth but judging by how cranky she's been lately, I'm guessing they're coming any time now.

We continue to learn how to parent every day and are so humbled by what God is doing in our lives. Though we know it will be difficult to see the LO's go home early next year, we know God has brought them and their family into our lives at this time for a particular reason. We're thankful to have a good relationship with the LO's mother and hope she allows us to remain in the children's lives after reunification. In the meantime, we just focus on enjoying them, loving them, and showing Jesus to them!

We would have loved to send out a holiday letter but of course, didn't get around to it. Just another thing to add to the list :-) Know that we love all of our friends and family dearly and wish you a very happy and blessed New Year!

"Blessed are the people who know the joyful sound! The walk, O Lord, in the light of Your countenance. In your name they rejoice all day long. And in Your righteousness they are exalted." Psalms 89:15-16

See you in 2013!
The Crowes

We survived the first month!

So we're already more than a month into our first foster placement and WOW! Talk about going through a million changes all at once. To try and summarize, it's been a little like this:

1. Yippy!
2. Wow!
3. That's so cute
4. I really miss my sleep
5. Why the heck did ____________ just do that? (blank can be filled with child's name, DCS, parents, Andy or myself, etc.)
6. My heart is overflowing with happiness
7. What did we get ourselves into
8. This is too much
9. God has called us to do a mighty thing!
10. We're never taking another placement
11. Yippy!
12. Wow!
13. That's so cute
14. I really miss my sleep

..and so on and so forth.

Getting the picture? After our first month, it's very clear that fostering children is the most complex and dynamic thing we've ever done. And even though all of the thoughts and emotions above play through my head on a daily (sometimes hourly and sometimes by the minute) basis and I'm constantly thinking of how demanding raising children really is, it's always indescribably sweet and reassuring that we've done the right thing when C runs to me to show me something new he's learned or M smiles the second she sees me or S gives me a hug out of nowhere.

In everything I did, I showed you that by this kind of hard work we must help the weak, remembering the words the Lord Jesus himself said: 'It is more blessed to give than to receive.' Acts 20:35

Though we don't know how long we'll have these little ones, I have a strong feeling that we'll have them with us through the holidays and alongside us as we ring in 2013! I've already been daydreaming about little hands and feet in the house at Christmas - what a blessing that will be!

I wish I could share every last detail of life over the last month and include pictures, but for privacy and confidentiality, obviously I can't. But, here's a little snippet for your reading pleasure!

C - the oldest boy. Super smart and pretty funny. Always wants to be the best at everything. Loves bossing around his little brother. Loves his baby sister. Protective of both his siblings. Loves preschool.

S - the youngest boy and middle child. The mischievous one! Very familiar with our time out corner, which we have affectionately called the Wall of Tears, because it's stained with C and S tears. It sounds more dramatic than it really is, I promise :-). S has a smile that will melt your heart and he wants to be just like his big brother. Over the last two weeks we've noticed S making huge strides in his speech and is saying more words and even stringing some together to form sentences! Great to see since he's been working with a developmental therapist for a while, now.

M - the baby girl. Such a happy, easy-going baby. Very smiley and entertains herself easily. We're blessed to have celebrated her latest achievement, pulling up, and her 8th month b-day in our home :-) Still doesn't sleep through the night but we're getting more accustomed to disjointed sleep schedules. M loves to watch her older brothers, even if she sometimes looks at them like "what are you DOING?!"

Even though the kids are very well-behaved and are filling our home with so much joy and so many laughs, Andy and I still struggle occasionally to have gone from 0 to 3 children overnight. In those times, it's good to remember the words and promises of our God:
         
Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due, when it is in your power to do it. Proverbs 3:27
      
Do not neglect to do good and to share what you have, for such sacrifices are pleasing to God. Hebrews 13:16

        

Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Philippians 2:4       

        

Give, and it will be given to you. Good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over, will be put into your lap. For with the measure you use it will be measured back to you.” Luke 6:38

         

But if anyone has the world's goods and sees his brother in need, yet closes his heart against him, how does God's love abide in him? 1 John 3:17

Until the next time...

 

Well that didn't take long!

So we were licensed the first part of August and about a week later received our first placement! THREE little ones (now referred to as LOs), under the age of 5! Talk about an immediate change in the Crowe's Nest. Though I'm not able to share specifics, here's a bit of our story for the last few weeks...

We were called in the middle of the night and the LOs arrived about 30 minutes later. Well, 2/3 of them arrived. The other LO didn't come until the next morning. I took the day off work but Andy didn't miss a beat and managed to make it to not one, but BOTH of his jobs! He's currently working part-time at Sony, doing security from 4-7 a.m. and then comes home, changes, and heads to his day job. Talk about a hard-working guy!

I took the day off to manage the children and Andy headed to work to work (duh) and arrange childcare. DCS assisted us with that, providing names of possible foster families willing to be our daycare and by the end of the day, we had something arranged (thank you LORD!) That day, it really only took me around 45 minutes to gain a whole new respect for stay at home mommies. WOW! I really had no idea :-) Kudos to all of you!!

That evening was rough, as the baby didn't want to sleep and I hadn't slept since about 1 a.m. the night before. Luckily the two other LOs went right to sleep and slept through the night (thank you LORD!) The next morning it was off to daycare and work and that's how it's been since.

Andy and I are having a wonderful time and the LOs are such a joy! A lot of work, but it's so worth it. It's been amazing getting to know the LOs and building relationships with them. Even on the rough days, I go to bed with such a full heart. It's really indescribable.

Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change. James 1:17

The process has been a real learning experience. Despite hours of training and talking with DCS folks, there's still so much we don't know. I'm still getting used to not knowing and just continuing on, first and foremost loving the children and providing a safe, secure, love-filled home for them. I'm definitely a person that needs everything laid out in front of me so I can understand and see the direction we're headed but God is teaching me so much about trusting Him above EVERYTHING else (like policies, procedures, information, plans, etc.) Every day is such a humbling experience. To say He's stretching me is an understatement :-)

"Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up." (James 4:10)

We have been so blessed to have so many people willing to help us out - bringing us clothes and items for the children, agreeing to help with childcare, bringing us meals, providing much needed advice about what the heck to do with three children, etc. The love has been so overwhelming but so, so appreciated. Thank you so much!!!!

Also, for friends and family far away, thank you for your calls, texts, encouragement, and love. I'm sorry it's taken me a while to get back and I'm really sorry if I haven't yet responded. In just a few weeks, it's been amazing to be reminded that so many people care so much for us and care for the LOs in our nest at the moment. God has provided so many beautiful people to live life with and we couldn't be more blessed.  Thank you, LORD! (are you seeing a theme ;-) )